Project #157813 - CORRECTIONS TO PAPER

Philosophy Tutors

Subject Philosophy
Due By (Pacific Time) 12/05/2016 12:00 am

I need corrections to be done to my paper. Below you will see some of the professors notes as well on the paper. Once awarded I will also submit document in Word format to make corrections. I ALREADY GOT A "D" ON THIS PAPER IF YOU DO NOT HAVE THE TIME TO DO IT PLEASE DONT BID.


When grading these papers, I am specifically interested if you've hit on the key concepts of your ethical theory, including the major sections laid out in the assignment tab.
Introduction: Needs Improvement
Your paper had an introduction that was missing some detail when introducing your topic, including a thesis - which let's the reader know what you plan to accomplish in your paper.
Explanation: Needs Improvement
The body of your paper looked good, though you really need more details.  Try writing thoughts and ideas that are nuanced to demonstrated a good understanding of the material - both for your position and against it.  
Application: Needs Improvement
When reading a paper, the reader is always asking the question (whether they know it or not), "What does this matter?"  Your application of the topic was clear enough to answer that question.  Continue on working on this...
Objection: Needs Improvement
They always say that the best way to really understand a position in philosophy is to understand it's weaknesses.  Not much of your writing in this class needs to be devoted to this, but it is an important aspect to writing an analytic paper, and you did it well!  To improve, try to get inside the mind of the person who would object to you and see if you can understand the issue from their point of view. 
Conclusion: Needs Improvement
Your conclusion should match the ideas and sustance of your introduction.  In your conclusion, answer the question, "Did I accomplish what I set out to?".
Resources: Needs Improvement
The requirement for this paper was that you have at least 2 sources that you used in your paper and that they area cited.  Be sure to make it clear how you are using the references that you cited in your paper.
Communication: Needs Improvement
After picking your theory, you noted the strengths of the theory along with the application.  Remember, when you write a paper in philosophy, it's so important to provide arguments as to why the theory is good.  Examples and application only go so far.  If there aren't clear arguments for your thesis, the paper appears weak. 
APA: Needs Improvement!
Your APA formatting had a few different mistakes.  As a professor, I see a LOT of APA mistakes.  For your final paper, just make sure to double check your APA formatting.  There are some good resources in the library here at Ashford.  I also wrote an inexpensive book on APA formatting that you may find helpful.  Either way, because many of the courses here require APA formatting, it's a good thing to master! 
Word Count: A tad short - spend more time on your writing.  With more substance, you would have scored better in other areas of your paper as well.




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